Category Archives: Parenting

Tips for Surviving the Holidays During and After Divorce by Steve McDonough, Esq.

The Holiday season is upon us.  Some people, like my mom for instance, love the holidays.  Decorating is a multi-week process and there are so many ornaments on the tree that she and my step-father must deploy a support cable attached to a nearby wall to help hold it up.  It is about what you would expect to see on a large suspension bridge. Between December 1st and the end of January (we have lots of January birthdays in the family) I estimate that my mother will host or attend (mostly host) somewhere in the area of 624 social events. [...]

Posted in Divorce, Divorce Health & Wellness, Parenting, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Suggested Reads

There are two books that I  frequently suggest to clients with school-age children, so I thought it might be helpful to reference them in a short post.   An overwhelming amount of material exists on divorce, some of it good and some of it harmful.  When you do find a helpful resource, don’t foget to share it with your spouse as early in the process as possible. The first is The Good Divorce by Constance Ahrons, Ph.D.  This book provides valuable information for families making the transition from a nuclear family to a “binuclear” family that spans two households while [...]

Posted in Child Custody, Collaborative Divorce, Divorce, Divorce Health & Wellness, Divorce Mediation, Parenting | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Divorce Coach (DC) = Damage Control (DC)

I recently received a comment from fellow attorney Nancy Van Tine the other day related to my post Maintain Your Divorce Sanity!  Nancy’s blog is the Massachusetts Divorce Law Monitor.   Nancy commented that she has never heard of a Divorce Coach, or as I sometimes refer to them in an effort to sound hip as a “DC.”  Nancy is an experienced divorce lawyer in Boston, so I think it is safe to say that if she is not sure just what a DC does, then there are lots of other people that are unfamiliar as well.  So, who are [...]

Posted in Collaborative Divorce, Divorce, Divorce Health & Wellness, Divorce Mediation, Parenting | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Your Legal Rights As A Stepparent: New Steps You Can Take

On February 15, 1950, Disney released its animated version of Cinderella.  Ever since, stepparents have been viewed as mean and ugly.  But in the real world of 2009, where about 50% of marriages end in divorce, and about 1/3 of us live in stepfamilies, it’s time to give stepparents a makeover. Even though stepparents may provide emotional and financial support to their stepchildren, they have no legal rights with regard to them.  They cannot authorize medical, dental, or surgical treatment, sign permission slips for school activities, or make any other decisions that would enhance the child’s educational experience. In some [...]

Posted in Divorce, Parenting | Leave a comment

The Surprisingly Excellent Attorney – From uptoparents.org

The website uptoparents.org has some thought-provoking content that focuses on parenting and protecting children during and after divorce.  I thought the section of the site on The Surprisingly Excellent Attorney was interesting.  This is certainly a far cry from the material on some lawyer websites extorting the benefits of fighting and destroying your recently ex-spouse in some type of prolonged fight!

Posted in Divorce Health & Wellness, Parenting, The Business of Law | Leave a comment

Attention Couch Sleepers! Consider My Divorce Mediation Stimulus Package

Almost every week I run into news stories  about how the recession is responsible for many couples staying together not because they want to, but because they have to.   Quite a few folks I have met with recently report one spouse sleeping on the couch for much longer than they probably should.  Although this may be good for the chiropractic industry, my personal theory is that you should really not sleep on a couch for more than two nights in a row if you are older than 25. So, is the recession really forcing people to stay together?  Some [...]

Posted in Divorce, Divorce Health & Wellness, Divorce Mediation, Parenting | Tagged | Leave a comment

Massachusetts Parent Education Program – Sign up Now!

If you are getting divorced and have not yet attended the mandatory parent education class, you might want to hurry up and register!  As of April 7, 2009, the cost of attendance in the class will increase from $65.00 to

Posted in Divorce, Events, Parenting | Leave a comment

Laid Off? New COBRA Regs May Save You Money On Health Insurance

A new subsidy related to COBRA health benefits may provide  financial assistance to individuals and families that have experienced a job loss.  President Obama signed into law H.R. 1, the American Recovery & Reinvestment Act on February 17, 2009.  Section 3001 (keep reading, there’s a quiz at the end…!) provides a 65% federal subsidy of COBRA premiums for employees who were “involuntary terminated” between September 1, 2008 and December 31, 2009, subject to certain income limitations and other restrictions, of course.  The subsidies are available for up to

Posted in Divorce, Parenting | Leave a comment

Protecting Children During a Divorce

I read a good article today by Joan B. Kelly, Ph.D.  Dr. Kelly is an experienced family therapist and parenting coordinator from California who frequently works with high-conflict parents.  The article,  titled Top Ten Ways to Protect Your Kids from the Fallout of a High Conflict Break-Up is posted on the website Mediate.com.   Although the title alludes to a high-conflict divorce, the items would certainly apply to any divorce where children are in the mix.   The third item on the list is to “Act like grown ups.  Keep your conflict away from the kids.”  Dr. Kelly correctly points out that [...]

Posted in Divorce, Parenting | Tagged , , | Leave a comment